The Four Agreements Review- I recommend this book to everyone. It is really seeking to open up a way of thinking and being that is free and happy – much needed if you are stressed or under pressure, especially in these testing times of quarantine.
My 4 best takeaways from “The Four Agreements”:
1. You can’t blame your parents for how they raised you. That’s what they were taught by their parents and the environment around them.
2. We are responsible for our own thoughts, emotions and actions. No one can force us to do anything unless you choose to.
3. People’s perspectives are based on their own experiences. We don’t have to react to them since they are not ours.
4. It’s possible to be authentic with yourself and others.
“The Four Agreements”:
Agreement 1: Be Impeccable With Your Word
Many people don’t realize the power of their words and don’t see the harm that can be caused by speaking carelessly, thoughtlessly, or aggressively. Most of us are aware that screaming at someone may be upsetting to them, but subtle little digs at them or gossip behind their backs can hurt others more than we realize, and in hurting them, we hurt ourselves.
Agreement 2: Don’t Take Anything Personally
When someone gives us feedback about our behavior or about us as people, it’s important to remember that no opinions are truly objective; we all have our biases, our filters through which we view the world. Because of this, we shouldn’t take anyone else’s view of us or our actions as entirely accurate. When someone says something about us, they’re really saying something about themselves and how they view the world.
Agreement 3: Don’t Make Assumptions
Taking this advice to an extreme may cause you to ignore your intuition about people or common sense about someone’s behavior that’s personally damaging to you. It can also open you up to manipulation if you train yourself to believe someone’s explanation of negative behavior rather than judging the behavior on its own. An example of this in action could be, for instance, not believing you’re being cheated on if your partner is exhibiting erratic behavior and the classic signs of infidelity, but he or she vehemently denies wrongdoing. Not making assumptions is a good suggestion, but it should be tempered by inner wisdom and common sense.
Agreement 4: Always Do Your Best
By this, Ruiz means to do the best you can at any given moment so you’ll have no regrets. Some days, your best isn’t as good as other days, and that’s okay. As long as you put an honest effort into life, you will have nothing to be ashamed of, and won’t beat yourself up over a less-than-stellar performance in retrospect.
If we can make these agreements our life will change for good. I don’t want to give away too much of this book, because the way everything is explained is so brilliant and builds in layers. The way it is told is important. You can feel the kind and loving intent within every word. This book is very easy to read and understand.